Match Report

Goals scored
None

Man of the match
Dean Weaving

Landsdowne were at home today in the first round of the Charity Cup, their opponents Kelson from the Premier. To get a result today every player had to be focused on their game and work for each other. It was a tough draw for a 1st round match. It was tougher than a "bushy burger" at a BBQ, infact when the draw was made on Sky sports it made Chaz's eyebrow stand up on end. To get a win they needed luck, determination, and belief. Unfortunately today all the above went missing.

As it was a cup tie kick off was at 10 o'clock in the morning which saw the team altogether for the first time in history at such an ungodly hour of 9:15 am (what is that all about??). I must say I feel sorry for their other halves coz if that's what you lot look like after being up for half an hour or so, sod waking up next to you lot every day!!!!!!! I thought it was a remake of the Munsters (for the younger generation, scary looking people).

It was a perfect day, the sun glistening off the morning dew, the pitch near perfect, but the performance way below par. Landsdowne took to the field already beaten before kick off and that showed in their performance more intent on fighting each rather than for each other.

Don't get me wrong or take anything away from the opposition, they were good no doubt about that. However, Landsdowne looked like tit's arguing on the pitch which obviously resulted in a poor performance. Their were so many goals it was a cricket score but considering they attacked for practically 90 min's 8-0 was a let off and hopefully a sharp lesson learnt.

The defence were so deep they just could not get up the pitch, managing to clear the ball only to see it come back time after time. Nothing was sticking and the opposition sprayed 30 yard passes across the back and into the middle with ease. The ball was treated like a hot potato and never stuck and was got rid of with panic within seconds. Vegas decided enough was enough and came short for the ball to try and play it simple but had no one come short so he played a sublime 30 yard ball to the midfielder on the wing, the only problem was it was the midfielder on the other pitch (what a tit!!!).

Landsdowne's passing never got going, well to be fair it never really started, but there were 4 plus points from the game if players are honest enough with themselves.

1) Work hard and learn our lesson of keeping the ball. It's better to loose it trying to play football than looking like we've never played football before.

2) Don't argue with each other. It make's us look like tit's and give's the opposition a huge lift.

3) Remember its Sunday League. We pay to play, enjoy it!!!!!!!!!!!!! We all have work to p*ss us off, frustration and passion is an ingredient, our friend's out there are the garnish.

4) My favourite one Whitey, and BB getting a fine, cha cha chiiinggggggggggggg , £16 lovely jubbly!!!!!!

BB I hear you say, who's that ? Well guys it's our own Brian Butler. It actually is his official nickname, given to him by Pete year's ago. It has something to do with the BB gun, apparently it goes of in second's. Pete never went into depth about it but I assume he means his short fuse, not the other, and if it is the other who am I to question what they do together. I share an apartment every year with Dave and a bath.

What more can I say apart from see you Sunday and let's dig in, put last week right and never play that shit again.

"MAN OF THE MATCH" Dean Weaving said he was gutted we argued and lost, but was pleased with his own performance and could not have given any more to the team. When asked if he would put in the same work next week it was too late, he was gone shouting "aaoooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwww Pro evo 5".